Letting Go

We all hold on to something, but many a time that 'thing' holds on to us. We don't accept it, but it is the truth! Disappointments, hurts, pain, anger and so on after a time of repeated exposures, cling on to us. They affect our behavior, our relationships and our work. So what do we do?


Well, we need to LET GO!


Come, take a peep into the session on Letting Go.

Materialistic Blessing -The Biblical Perspective

Click on the images for larger view.

Seeking God’s will in the gray areas of your life

(March 2011)

Facilitated by Ashley Vinil http://www.google.com/profiles/jpashley

Gray areas you have struggled with (participant’s inputs)

1. Manipulating data / figures in reports (forced by managers)

2. When my team-mate asks me daily, ‘when Jesus will come and I could not answer’

3. Giving fake excuses to my customers

4. Software piracy okay?

5. Tattooing okay?

6. Performing the best at work place

7. <14% alcohol consumption

8. Dating with a seeker

9. Rash driving

10. Not obeying traffic rules

11. Difficulty in convincing others about the gospel

12. Tolerance to harmful talk

13. Close relationship with non-believers

14. Listening to cinema / secular songs

15. Struggle between yes and no

16. Saving finances like LIC, Mutual funds etc

17. Eating prasadam – food offered to idols

18. Fasting regularly

19. Putting make-up?

20. Is it Christian to be successful / rich in life?

21. Is it normal not to be willing to get married?

When deciding on the execution of a gray area, where are you on this scale?

Abstain(Play it safe) --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Participate (without any guilt)

Mark Twain in 1903 wrote ‘a new crime’ – where murderers where proved innocent because of insanity causes.

Harvard university business ethics professor explains ethics as “never do anything bad that you think might end up in the newspaper”

Gray areas exist in world because Truth is relative and not absolute in the secular world

• Truth and values are changing or being redefined even as we speak

• Morality is considered a state of mind and hence subjective

• It is bound by places and situations

• It depends on circumstances and perspective

in Christianity because there are no rules for many new things, only guidelines

• We live in a pagan environment

• We enjoy the secular lifestyle with lots of loopholes

• We have a relative allegiance to God and world

• We face fresh challenges each day

Group discussion:

Christian freedom with relation to gray areas

Christian rules and convictions

People who tried to overcome the gray areas:

Story of Simeon Stylites

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Simeon_Stylites

Lonely living – the Bosci

http://www.suite101.com/content/the-bosci-a173291

Monasteries

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monastery

The legal living vs Lawless living

Participant’s views: What is SIN?

"Son, whatever weakens your reasoning, impairs the tenderness of your conscience, obscures your sense of God, or takes away your relish for spiritual things; in short, if anything increases the authority and power of the flesh over the Spirit, then that to you becomes sin, however good it is in itself." Susanna Wesley explaining SIN to young John Wesley

When Jesus was on earth as a human being, people asked him questions on many gray areas – instead of just answering them, he made them THINK and brought their focus on 2 commandments:

Love the LORD your GOD

Love your neighbor as yourself

He not only spoke, he also showed them this - by dying on the cross for our sins

THINK – SAY – DO what is GOD’s will in your life (keeping the 2 simple yet HUGE commandments) even as you face the many gray areas of your life.

Testing your gray area: Look up 2 Peter 1:3-10 and the see if you can apply the test to each of your gray area. Virtue, Knowledge, Self-control, Endurance, Godliness, Brotherly kindles, Love, Faith in GOD, diligence to do His will.

3 ways you can handle gray areas:

PERSONAL PERSPECTIVE

Are the gray areas developing habits which can lead to bondage (drinking, smoking, lying, lusting etc) Is it creating situations for me to be tempted and fall in temptation? How is it affecting or influencing my character? Will it defile God’s temple (me)?

HORIZONTAL PERSPECTIVE

Will the way I handle the gray areas help others or cause them to stumble? Will it promote good for others? Will it help me to share the gospel message?

VERTICAL PERSPECTIVE

After concluding the gray area, will you be able to thank GOD sincerely? Will I be delightfully praise GOD during the performance of the gray area? Can I give it as a testimony to other believers? And finally Will it bring GLORY to God?

The call for us is to be DANIELS in a secular world. Will you be the ONE?

Building on your Strengths

Session By: Ashley Chris Vinil

Session date: 3rd Jul 2010 

Time: 6 - 8.30pm

Venue: Koramangala Methodist Church, Bangalore

Few points from the session:

• Most effective leaders alter the course of your life. 
• Influencing people around you- Does not depend on the high/low position.
• Invest in strengths-Own and also around us. Eg. A couple can have their own different strength. one can be a good multitasker while other can just do one task at a time.
• Its a process and not an event-Little by little to make something amazing. Eg. The Kid in the Karate Kid movie, Nehemaiah from the Old Testament.

Ashley has narrated a story of a pastor who was inviting people to the church and was upset because only few turned up.  Then he thought of a way and has invited the people saying , "The Church has died, please come to the burial".  He had put a coffin in the church, and people came to see because they were curuious to know whats there in the coffin.

One by one came forward and looked into the coffin and left remorseful as there was a mirror kept in the coffin.

• If we focus on our strengths- The happiness quotient Increases, The satisfaction also increases. 
• Think of one strength that you have.
• We see our mentors, people around us -> Way to build on strengths.
• Truth is No one is perfect 10 on the rate of strengths. When one goes upto the level 10, then one stops growing leading to stagnation and finally LOST. Hence, we got to keep going, step by step, little by little.
• Focusing on JESUS-who is on Ten-Our Strength.
• One should be aware about our strengths and weakness. SWOT-Skill Development.
• Often we fail to address our strengths but concentrate more on learning kills and leaving.
• Working on our strengths- Keep developing.
• STOP focusing on weaknesses and START working on our strengths.
• There are people who have specific areas of strengths and are weak in other areas. Eg. WinstonChurchill was  WAR HERO and a PEACE ZERO.
• We do not fit in in few positions/strenghts, that means our strength is something else.
• We should first know/identify our strengths and then start growing in the RIGHT STRENGTH -RIGHT TIME.
• Spiritual Formation- SALVATION(By FAITH), HOLINESS(Living by God's Word) & WISDOM

Activity: D05

The observations made in the activity:

• We do not communicate our strengths to others. 
• We keep/communicate with self.
• We do not ask questions.
• We are busy with our own work.
• We do not reward others according to what they've done.
• We all have strength in all of us.

Group interaction:

1) List of strengths of Joshua:

• Trust in God 
• Confidence
• Courage
• Obedience
• Leadership
• Humble
• Committment towards God
• Planning and executing(Joshua 24)
• Passionate about what he has to do for the Lord

2) How Joshua built on his strengths?

• Joshua has seen Moses -his MENTOR- who was a good Leader. 
• Joshua TRUSTed in the Lord Always.
• Joshua displayed FAITH in God.
• Joshua PRAYed to God.

3) Compare your work life with that of Joshua:

• Challenges Joshua faced-Handling 
• Delegation and Allocation(Team work)
• Courage to take Tough Decisions
• Time to let go-Farewell

The Presentation :

Appreciating Relationships

"Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

Be Joyful Always J
Pray Continually P
Give Thanks in all circumstances T

Follow JPT rule daily

http://www.storypreso.com/blog/2009/10/3stories-1message/

Appreciation = Valuing traits + Paying attention to happenings around you + acknowledging the worth of the other person

Then EXPRESS it (Don’t keep it to yourself).

Use the VPA rule to find all that you love to appreciate, then DO it

Knapp’s Relationship Model
Circle of location
Your contacts are based on your location at work, leisure and home + internet

Initiation
10-15 seconds of time
Acting out, Best foot forward
Standard greetings
Information held – do I want to meet or not?
Information sought – do I want to continue to not?

Experimenting
Gain information
This is the Progress point
Judge and continue – with or without

Intensifying
Self-disclosure
Less formal
Individual traits & preferences are expressed
Partition point
Judge and match – yes or no
If YES


Integrating
Doing things together
Pairing up – friendship, courtship
Shared identity


Bonding
Legal relationship
Only few reach this level
If NO


Differentiating
Stress on ME instead of WE
Different interests / hobbies

Circumscribing (Developing boundaries)
Communication reduces
Some topics are taboo. Only cause pain when discussed
Chances of getting alright by sincere love and discussions


Stagnating
Avoid discussions
Irritated with other’s behaviors
Others notice


Avoiding
Physical separation
Reduce opportunities to interact

Termination
Move out.


How happy a person is, depends upon the depth of his gratitude – John Miller
‘Christ – You – Others’ triangle

Facts:

• Appreciation should be pro-active (when giving)
• Appreciation should be earned (when receiving)
• Appreciating habit comes out of appreciating yourself (What you have is what you give)

Practicing Appreciation in Relationship

Traits you Value	Why you are grateful	Individual

Practicing Appreciation at Work

Tasks you do	Opportunity to make a difference	So what?